Gut Check

Thank you Nate for waking me at 5:45am the last three days to tell me you were ready to go to camp. Tie dye shirt, milk-mustache, pool towel and all.
Thank you LJ for telling anyone who would listen, that you were getting to go to camp... and it was splash day. And you were enthralled and all systems go!
Thank you yoga students encouraging me and asking me for the source of my reading in last night's class because it really resonated with you.
Thank you breath, for helping me manage the stress of our closings tomorrow and Friday. And did I mention the move to a new house?
Thank you new friendships.
Thank you school speech therapist, Mrs. B, for teaching me how to use a new communication device for LJ... in your personal time after the school year was completed.
Thank you to my husband who is learning to flow with all that is, and embracing the changes.
Thank you summer cold for reminding me not to charge forward without making the choice to take care of myself first.
Thank you new house for opening my heart to the possibilities and hope in the dreams I have for my beautiful, future life.
Thank you bravery that surrounds us all.
Thank you family and friends from around the world who support and encourage us to stay resilient and grow, even in the face of adversity.  I feel rich with your love and support.
Thank you moment to moment, because "nothing lasts forever"...the bad times nor the good times...I'm learning to be present in the moment, gut check and all & I am so thankful!!

 "Reality only exists within the present moment, everything else is a memory or a guess." Jess Nickerson

Oh, and thank you hard drive crashing and pronouncing itself "done and done" so I can unplug for a few weeks till we get settled in the new digs:)

Feed Your Soul

Accessible House

Due to our house hunt, Anna (our fabulous caregiver) being off for her wedding and honeymoon, LJ back to having a tough time sleeping at night, our impending move & the wrap-up of the school year for the boys, my posts have fallen by the wayside.  Trying super hard not to beat myself up these days.  I feel like I've been tired for the last month.  I feel like life seems to keep coming in easy waves and tidal waves- and lately I've been on a tidal wave.  That's the beauty of ebb and flow I suppose. 

The good news is that lately I've been learning to pay attention when things are good.  To lean in and connect to being present in the moment.  I've started being more observant not just when things are tidal waves, but when things are seemingly fine too.  I recently discovered that I had been neglecting myself- my safe, grounded spot.  When things get hard our tendency is to make them harder.  By turning inward, I've been learning to hold my awareness in the subtle realm instead.  And consequently, I am more able to find the quiet, stillness when things get chaotic.

And things are about to get pretty chaotic on the home-front.  The kids' last day of school is June 21st.  Our house is under contract.  We close on June 27th.  That's three 3 weeks!  But perhaps the most awesome news in this post is that we have found an accessible house that's less then a mile from our current one!  It was a completely, pleasant surprise to us that we found it so quickly and that all the stars seem to have aligned. Perhaps this is the law of good karma, who really knows? (Please, still cross everything. Just saying this out loud publicly makes me afraid I will jinx something.) But I'm staying positive.

We close on the new house June 28th. And we hope to move the first week of July so we have all summer long to get acclimated to our new digs.  The new house is move-in ready and has an open floor plan so that LJ will have lots of roaming room.  The only thing we have to do is have a ramp poured to the side entrance and have two doorways widened so they will be 36" wide.  We are also going to have a touch pad installed so that when LJ drives his motor chair or walks up to it in his walker, he will press it and his door will automatically open for him.  Lewis' room also has a full bathroom in it.  Down the road we will have the shower floor lowered into the sub-floor so that it can become a roll-in shower for him.  And there is space for us to also install a pocket door for his privacy.  All the bedrooms are on the same level as the kitchen, dining room and living room and outdoor patio. But the most crucial detail?  The lot is FLAT and we do not have a behemoth incline to contend with!

While I am sad to see us leave this house and all the stories and memories it embodies, (and yes I have my fears too but mostly its about the settlement/financing process) I LOVE the new house.  I am excited to uncover new memories.  In the spirit of making changes, and in the stretching, we expand, we grow, we change.